Throughout her decades as a therapist, Dr. Alexandra has helped many people navigate being “the affair partner.” Participating in infidelity creates an intoxicating yet profoundly confusing blend of emotions and experiences. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra examines the psychology of this role and offers a compassionate look into the surrounding context: the thrills, secret benefits, sources of shame, and potential origin stories embedded within this controversial role.

Relevant links:

“A Great Wagon” by Rumi

Journal of Sex & Martial Therapy: “Object of Desire Self-Consciousness Theory” by Anthony F. Bogaert and Lori A. Brotto

“Taking Sexy Back” by Dr. Alexandra Solomon

Facebook Group: Esther Perel Discussion Group

Reimagining Love episode: “Guidance for the Newly Single”

Order Dr. Alexandra’s new book, Love Every Day

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